1. Red Sox opening day at Fenway Park is today. Nothing beats home-cooked chicken and beer!

2. Charles Manson was denied parole this week. I guess Dancing With The Stars will have to wait until next year.

3. Kanye West is reportedly now dating Kim Kardashian. 'I don't mean to interupt, but that last joke about Charles Manson was the best joke of all time.'

4. President Obama filed his taxes today. I'm not sure he can keep claiming Joe Biden as a dependent though.

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