1. Astronomers have discovered a distant planet made completely of diamond. Kobe Bryant has already purchased it for his wife for the next time he's caught cheating.

2. Mark Wahlberg is opening a burger joint with his brothers called Wahlburgers. You can order them with Kevin Bacon and a side of Jerry Rice!

3. Justin Beiber is recording a Christmas album for release this holiday season. I can't think of a better reason to convert to Judaism. 

4. China has banned the download of songs by Lady Gaga, Beyonce, Katy Perry, and Backstreet Boys. They may be on to something here!

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