1. Despite the small crowd I had at my stand-up show last night, I still had more viewers than President Obama's jobs speech.
2. The NFL season has officially begun. So what's the over/under on how many felonies will be committed this year by Steelers players?
3. This weekend is the tenth anniversary of the 9/11 attacks. Osama Bin Laden will be celebrating by still being dead!
4. An 84 year old woman must retake a driving test after hitting Reese Witherspoon with her car. If she passes, she promises to REALLY get her next time.
2. The NFL season has officially begun. So what's the over/under on how many felonies will be committed this year by Steelers players?
3. This weekend is the tenth anniversary of the 9/11 attacks. Osama Bin Laden will be celebrating by still being dead!
4. An 84 year old woman must retake a driving test after hitting Reese Witherspoon with her car. If she passes, she promises to REALLY get her next time.