1. A substitute teacher in Santa Fe was found passed out in the classroom from alcohol. In my high school that was called home room.

2. Cantalopes have listeria. Apples have arsenic. I'm glad my fruit intake comes primarily from Skittles.

3. A 44-year old mom was arrested for having sex with some of her teenage son's hockey teammates. What ever happened to going out for ice cream after a win?

4. The new changes to Facebook have millions of people outraged! Even more than the last time they made changes. And the time before that. And the time before that. And the time before that......

5. Myspace saw a 25% increase in activity due to the changes made on Facebook today. But was back to normal 5 minutes later when people realized it still sucks and went back.

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