1. Hey Republicans, did you see that hologram performance by Tupac at Coachella? Maybe there is a chance you can bring back Ronald Reagan after all!

2. Miley Cyrus was rushed to the ER after she accidentally cut herself with a kitchen knife. If she wants to cut something, how about cutting her career, short.

3. First the GSA gets caught spending thousands in Vegas, then the Secret Service is caught partying with prostitutes in Columbia. Who's running Washington these days, Charlie Sheen?

4. I wish Ted Nugent would stop saying shitty offense things about the president and go back to making shitty offense rock songs.

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