1. Hey North Carolina, you know what really violates the institution of marriage? Not letting 2 people in love get married.

2. Al-Qaeda has invented a new type of underwear bomb! Great! Now I gotta take off my boxers at airport security.

3. John Travolta alleged tried to grope his masseur. Kind of gives new meaning to the movie 'Get Shorty'.

4. Brad Pitt is the new face for advertising campaigns by Chanel No. 5. Hey, he needs to pay off that engagement ring to Angelina somehow!

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